1979 FRANK ZAPPA - SEALED PROMO - JOE'S GARAGE ACTS 2+3 ORIGINAL 2LPS NO D HOLES

$

80

NOVEMBER 19TH 1979 - FRANK ZAPPA - JOE'S GARAGE ACTS II & III - THIS IS THE ORIGINAL U.S.A. 12" VINYL RECORD - 2 LP PROMO SET - INCLUDES THE WARNING - ANOTHER ZAPPA ALBUM! - PLEASE AUDITION BEFORE AIRPLAY! STICKER ON TOP OF THE SHRINK - THAT'S BECAUSE AS AMAZING AS IT MIGHT SOUND, THIS 36 YEAR OLD ALBUM IS STILL SEALED- BUT WAIT...., THERE'S MORE..., BECAUSE THERE ARE ABSOLUTELY NO DILL HOLES, UNLESS ONE HAPPENS TO BUY IT, BUT THERE'S NO DRILL HOLES, SAW CUTS OR CUT CORNERS EITHER - THE TWO RECORD SET STICKER IS ON THE ACTUAL COVER UNDER THE SHRINK WHERE IT BELONGS, AND THERE'S A GOLD PROMO STAMP ON THE BACK COVER - BY THE WAY, IF ONE'S BEHIND WEE TO OPEN IT, THAT PERSONS BEHIND WOULD DISCOVER THAT IT'S A FOLD-OUT COVER WITH THE ART WORK, LYRICS AND OTHER STUFF PAGES IN THE CENTER INSIDE - NOW I DON'T WANNA GET ANYBODY'S HOPES UP, BUT THERE HAD BEEN A PROMO POSTER WITH SHEIK YERBOUTI, JOE'S GARAGE ACT I AND JOE'S GARAGE ACTS II & III THAT HAD BEEN INCLUDED IN SOME OF THESE ACTS II & III PROMO ALBUMS - BUT IF YOU DECIDE TO OPEN IT AND THERE'S NOT ONE IN THERE, I DON'T WANNA HEAR YOUR INCESSANT WHINING ABOUT IT - HOWEVER, IF YOU DO DECIDE TO OPEN IT AND BUY BEFORE MIDNITE TONIGHT, I'LL GIVE YEZ A PLASTIC OUTER SLEEVE ABSOLUTELY FREE - IT'LL BE THE ZAPPA RECORDS RED LABELS LURKING IN THERE - SRZ-2-1502 - CHECK OUT THE PHOTOS AND READ THE ENTIRE DESCRIPTION AFTER YOU SCROLL PAST THE OBLIGATORY CRUD BELOW - OK LARRY?

RECENTLY, A CONSUMER COINCIDENTALLY NAMED LARRY WITH AN INQUIRING MIND ASKED ME:

HEY REV, HOW COME YOU OFTEN WRITE "OK LARRY" IN YOUR LISTINGS? THIS LARRY WANTS TO KNOW.

WELL LARRY, IT'S BECAUSE IN A RECENT SURVEY CONDUCTED BY REV. A. WEST, THE GREATEST LIVING ZAPPA SELLER KNOWN TO MANKIND, REVEALED THAT 70% OF ALL MALES WHO SAID THEY LIKED FRANK ZAPPA WERE NAMED LARRY. NOW CHECK THIS OUT: OUT OF THE REMAINING 30% THAT WEREN'T NAMED LARRY, 20% WERE FEMALES, 30% ALTHOUGH THEY WEREN'T ACTUALLY NAMED LARRY, HAD FRIENDS WHO OFTEN CALLED THEM LARRY ANYWAY, AND ANOTHER 40% LATER ADMITTED TO ME THAT THEY DIDN'T REALLY LIKE FRANK ZAPPA, BUT TOLD ME THEY DID JUST TO F*CK MY SURVEY UP.

ALSO, I'D BET THAT MOST IF NOT ALL OF THE FEMALES WHO WEREN'T NAMED LARRY, BUT SAID THEY LIKED FRANK ZAPPA WERE PROBABLY LYING TOO. BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW THAT NO FEMALES  EVER REALLY LIKED ZAPPA. SO WHAT DOES ALL O' THIS CRUD MEAN?

WELL, IF YOU'RE NOT NAMED LARRY AND LIKE FRANK ZAPPA, YOU JUST MIGHT WANNA CHANGE YOUR NAME TO LARRY. SO YOU CAN BE LIKE THE OTHERS, JUST LIKE YOU. OK LARRY?

IF ONE'S BEHIND WERE TO OPEN AND PLAY IT, IT WOULD HEAR:

SIDE ONE POOTING FORTH: A TOKEN OF MY EXTREME - STICK IT OUT - SY BORG.

SIDE TWO OOZING OUT: DONG WORK FOR YUDA - KEEP IT GREASY - OUTSIDE NOW.

SIDE THREE WIPING UP: HE USED TO CUT THE GRASS - PACKARD GOOSE.

SIDE FOUR FLUSHING DOWN: WATERMELON IN EASTER HAY - A LITTLE GREEN ROSETTA.

LEFT BOTTOM CORNER HAS A TEAR IN THE SHRINK. THAT'S BECAUSE AFTER 36 YEARS THE SHRINK STARTS TO PULL ON THE CORNERS. SO YEAH, THERE'S SHRINK CORNER PULLING GWINE ON IN THE OTHER CORNERS. NATURALLY A LIGHT RECORD INDENTATION. CHECK OUT ALL OF THE PHOTOS. OK LARRY?  

FREE MEDIA MAIL SHIPPING IN THE U.S.A.

ADD $10.00 FOR PRIORITY MAIL AT CHECK-OUT IF YOU WANT IT.

$14.00 FOR AIR MAIL SHIPPING TO CANADA.

$24.00 FOR AIR MAIL SHIPPING TO ANY OTHER LOCATION IN THE WORLD. , MOLDAVIA, THE RIPOFF REPUBLIC OR THE PILFER ISLANDS }.

HEY LARRY, YOU STILL HANGING AROUND WAY DOWN HERE? WELL SINCE IT'S OBVIOUS THAT YOU HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO TONITE SIMPLY CHECK OUT MY OTHER FRANK ZAPPA AND THE MOTHERS OF INVENTION, CAPTAIN BEEFHEART AND HIS MAGIC BAND, TIM BUCKLEY , LARRY "WILD MAN" FISCHER , ALICE COOPER , STEVE VAI , PLUS MORE FRANK ZAPPA / CAPTAIN BEEFHEART RELATED ARTISTS AND GROUPS THAN YEZ CAN SHAKE YER STICK AT, AND AS IF THAT WEREN'T ENOUGH I'VE ADDED SOME COOL PSYCHEDELIC / HARD ROCK ARTISTS FOR YOUR DANCING AND DINING PLEASURE SUCH AS: CAPTAIN BEYOND, KING CRIMSON. JETHRO TULL, JIMI HENDRIX, PINK FLOYD, THE TUBES, BULL ANGUS, BLUE CHEER WITH THE LEGENDARY DICKIE PETERSON, MOUNTAIN WITH THE PORTLY LESLIE WEST AND THE EXTREMELY COOL FELIX PAPPAPARDI, ROOT BOY SLIM AND THE SEX CHANGE BAND, AND MANY OTHERS IN MY E-BAY STORE: SIR RICHARD PUMP A LOAF'S BAKERY. WHERE THE BUNS ARE ALWAYS HOT AND THE MUFFINS JUST MIGHT BE PERSUADED INTO REMOVING THEIR ROSETTAS EVEN FOR SOME GEEZER FROM THE CRUSTATION PERIOD, BACK WHEN CRUSTY GEEZERS ROAMED THE EARTH. THE ADMISSION REMAINS ABSOLUTELY FREE. . SO WADDA YEZ WAITIN' FOR, HUH?